Breaking: Gallatin Sophomore Describes Concentration in 500 Page Poem
While attempting to say something as to give some idea about what it is that he is doing in college, NYU Gallatin Sophomore Jake Tyler reportedly wrote a five-hundred-page lyric describing the alleged concentration he is pursuing in university.
The teller of tales, bard of the songs, master of the obscure tongues, allegedly took one full year to write this modern epic in order that he could be as detailed as he could when describing his field of research. Nonetheless, many peers remain puzzled as to what exactly Mr Tyler is currently studying.
“So is he like an English major?” said an unimaginative pre-med when told of Mr Tyler’s long verse when anyone who’s paying the slightest attention knows that the language Mr Tyler invented for this poem is not at all related to English. “Wait, so you’re telling me that he wrote this 500-page-poem in this new, made-up language that nobody but him understands and that that is what’s going to show up on his degree when he graduates?”
Precisely you silly pre-med, precisely.
When reached for comment, Mr Tyler’s concentration advisors were pleased to inform the The Village Groupie that Mr Tyler was in good academic standing, receiving mostly grades consisting of words with no vowels, amounting to a GPA of the sound of drums and horses.